17 Real-Life Hilarious Quotes about Married Life

Married Life Can be so Much Fun if You Have a Sense of Humor

Married life is not that simple, and everybody knows that. The key to having a happy marriage is different for every couple. However, it is essential not just to love each other, but also to accept each other’s flaws. Otherwise, the love will fade away with every quarrel and nothing except annoyance will be left. Learn how to have fun together and make each other laugh even if the situation is sad, and your marriage will be long-lasting and full of delight.

Quotes about Married Life

“Why does a woman work ten years to change a man"s habits and then complain that he"s not the man she married?” - Barbra Streisand

Click NEXT to read the most amusing quotes about marriage, and have fun pinning them!

Besides humor, a happy marriage requires complete harmony in a sexual relationship, so learn how to make him want you. When the time passes, it is not so easy to surprise each other when it comes to intimacy, and some tips might be helpful.

Quotes about Married Life

"A husband is what is left of the lover after the nerve is extracted" - Helen Rowland

Quote #3

"Marriage has no guarantees. If that"s what you"re looking for, go live with a car battery." - Erma Bombeck

Quote #4

"Husband got excited thinking I was touching myself under the covers but I was actually just opening a Kit Kat I didn"t wanna share." - Valerie

Quote #5

I love being married. It"s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life. - Rita Rudner

Quote #6

We"re assembling a crib from Ikea... Which option on their toll free number gets you a marriage counselor? - Mommy Honesty

Quote #7

My husband is on the roof - only a few inches away from an insurance claim that could completely change my life. - Stella G. Maddox

Quote #8

My husband still talks about that one time he loaded the dishwasher correctly like it"s going to get our kids into Harvard. - Momma Unfiltered

Quote #9

Sorry. I was late because I had to find all the things that were in plain sight for my husband. - Housy Wife

Yes, everything was totally different when you were falling in love. Like all happy couples, you probably did not miss any chance of going nasty, and all your friends kept telling you “Get a room!” Cherish those memories and try to revive them from time to time.

Quotes about Married Life

My husband gets so mad when I introduce him as my first husband. - fabulous af

Quote #11

Know those adorable idiosyncrasies you loved when first dating? After 20 years of marriage they become what the police refer to as "motive". - Just Linda

Quote #12

My husband called me at work because his boss wanted to know where he saw himself in 5 years and needed me to tell him. - Tired Working Mom

Quote #13

Marriage is basically just whispering, "Are you awake? I need to show you this cat video."

Quote #14

When you see a married couple walking down the street, the one that"s a few steps ahead is the one that"s mad. - Helen Rowland

Quote #15

“They say love is blind... and marriage is an institution. Well, I"m not ready for an institution for the blind just yet.” - Mae West

Quote #16

“A wedding is just like a funeral except that you get to smell your own flowers.” - Grace Hansen

Quote #17

Marriage is like a hot bath, once you get used to it it"s not so hot anymore.

15 Relationship Quotes That Illustrate That Love Knows No Distance

Relationship quotes can help you to figure out how you really feel which is amazing, considering that they are so short. It often happens that several sentences mean the whole world to a particular person. This post is devoted to long-distance relationships that tend to be difficult for partners but no less beautiful and romantic.

Relationship Quotes

"I imagine a line, a white line, painted on the sand and on the ocean, from me to you."
― Jonathan Safran Foer

Quote #2

"The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt with the heart."
― Helen Keller

Quote #3

"The scariest thing about distance is you don’t know if they’ll miss you or forget about you."
― Nicholas Sparks

Quote #4

"The simple lack of her is more to me than others’ presence."
― Edward Thomas

Quote #5

"If you listen to the wind very carefully, you’ll be able to hear me whisper my love for you."
― Andrew Davidson

Click NEXT to read thought-provoking quotes about long-distance relationships.

Relationship Quotes

When your partner is far away, you don’t wonder how to make him want you. Instead, you truly miss him. You miss the sound of his voice, his smile, his smell…

Quote #6

"Your absence has not taught me how to be alone; it has merely shown me that when together we cast a single shadow on the wall."
― Doug Fetherling

Quote #7

"No matter how far you are, I will wait for you until we can finally be together."
― Helen Keller

Quote #8

You don’t ask him “Show me love” because every phone call and every text message reveals his true feelings.

"This is the sad bed of chosen chastity because you are miles and mountains away."
― Erica Jong

Quote #9

"In true love, the smallest distance is too great, and the greatest distance can be bridged."
― Hans Nouwens

Quote #10

"I don"t cry because we"ve been separated by distance, and for a matter of years. Why? Because for as long as we share the same sky and breathe the same air, we"re still together."
― Donna Lynn Hope

Relationship Quotes

Sometimes when you feel especially lonely and sad, read relationship quotes. These utterances can teach you to be strong and hope for the better.

Quote #11

"Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love."
― Albert Einstein

Quote #12

"Love knows no distance; it hath no continent; its eyes are for the stars."
― Gilbert Parker

Quote #13

"The distance maybe far and wide but my heart can cover them all. The space between us is so much more but you should know that I love you so!"
― Linda Roy

Quote #14

"It’s not the distance that’s the enemy, but the endless time I have to wait to hold you in my arms."
― Livius Besski

Quote #15

"There are no goodbyes for us. Wherever you are, you will always be in my heart."
― Gandhi

After reading relationship quotes you will understand that long-distance relationships can work. The key is not give up and be patient. Good luck!

21 Awesome Love Quotes from Pinterest to Express Your Feelings

There are so many love quotes that are extremely beautiful. And our list contains the quotes that are not only pleasant to hear, but that convey the truth, as well. Check them out!

Love Quotes

Source: danahm1975 via Pinterest

In French, you don’t say “I miss you.” You say “tu me manques” which means “you are missing from me.” I love that.

Quote #2

Source: shannongeurin via Pinterest

I have found the one whom my soul loves.
~ Song of Solomon 3:4

Quotes #3

Source: jessicakeala via Pinterest

"I love you because the entire universe conspired to help me find you."
~ The Alchemist

Quote #4

Source: lucyxorenee via Pinterest

It’s amazing how one day someone walks into your life and you can’t remember how you ever lived without them.

Quote #5

Source: Nelsonlee2014 via Pinterest

Your voice is my favorite sound.

Click NEXT to read more love quotes to express your feelings.

Love Quotes

Source: lifehack via Pinterest

You are forever and always the hero of my heart, the love of my life.

Quotes #7

Source: JessicaMpins via Pinterest

And I’d choose you;
In a hundred lifetimes,
In a hundred words,
In any version of reality,
I’d find you and I’d choose you.
~ The Chaos of Srtars

Quote #8

Source: pattizappa via Pinterest

He’s annoying, he’s hilarious, he makes me yell, he drives me crazy, he’s out of his mind but he’s everything I want.

Quote #9

Source: bobspintrest via Pinterest

When I tell you I Love You I don’t say it out of habit or to make conversation. I say it to remind you that you are the best thing that Ever Happened to me.

Quote #10

Source: ajacqlyn0074 via Pinterest

"When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible."
~ When Harry met Sally

Love Quotess

Source: suzannezahorski via Pinterest

"Because of you I can feell myself slowly but surely becoming the me I have always dreamed of being."
~ Tyler Knott Gregson

Quote #12

Source: Scoobs63 via Pinterest

I wish I could turn back the clock. I’d find you sooner and love you longer.

Quote #13

Source: ceciliaking05 via Pinterest

The best love is the one that makes you a better person, without changing you into someone other than yourself.

Quote #14

Source: mya1731 via Pinterest

When I’m with you, hours feel like seconds. When we"re apart, days feel like years.

Quotes #15

Source: morningquotes via Pinterest

Maybe I’m too late to be your first. But right now, I’m preparing myself to be your last.

Love Quotes

Source: rennee92 via Pinterest

You make my heart smile.

Quote #17

Source: alexvanwert via Pinterest

Love is not something go out and look for. Love finds you, and when it does, ready or not, it’ll be the best thing to ever happen to you.

Quote #18

Source: wgettingmarried via Pinterest

I saw that you were perfect and so I loved you. Then I saw that you were not perfect and I loved you even more.

Quote #19

Source: diamond334 via Pinterest

I think about you a little more than I should.

Quote #20

Source: ishanchronic via Pinterest

Theres nothing like us nothing like you & me together

Quote #21

Source: weddingshoppe via Pinterest

"I got lost in him, and it’s the kind of lost that’s exactly like being found."
~ Claire LaZebnik